Just a story.

Sorry for the absence lately.  First, a big shout-out to my Hippie Boy who turned 11 yesterday.  :)  He is awesome.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Now for my story.  Some interesting coincidences have occurred in the past year or 2 among myself & four close friends.  Almost simultaneously, 2 of us had our marriages end, 1 was in the process of getting ready to end hers & the other one was in the midst of "do I stay or do I go."  Well obviously I'm one whose marriage ended.  While everything was going down, my friend C and I talked often (hers was the other marriage that was ending), providing moral support, asking how you handle the next step, what to expect...etc.  And after several months of her marriage being done, C met up with a guy she dated in high school (J), purely accidental.  She began to glow, you could see her happiness return, I was ecstatic for her.  I listened to her explain that he was the first guy she ever was "in love" with.  Her very first love.  And they're a couple now.  A very happy couple, very much in love.

About a month or so after C found J, I was driving home from a car show in KS and I get a text from Facebook saying that W wants to be my friend on FB.  My heart jumped.  W was the first guy I ever fell "in love" with.  My very first love.  We both grew up in the same small town, went to school together (well, until he got kicked out--he was a bad-boy).  We dated for about a minute--which consisted of him visiting me every day during the summer while I was babysitting, a couple of trysts on his mom's living room floor & watching my mom chase him off after she caught us in my room.  Well my parents were pretty strict & his mom was not.  He was mostly free to do what he wanted while I towed the line being a good-girl.  Plus, I'm anti-social so back then I preferred to come home from school & hang out on the back porch or the neighbor's porch (we lived out in the country) instead of doing all the stuff that high-school kids do.  Plus, it was easier to do that than argue with my mom.  There was never going to be a chance for W & I to have a relationship beyond what we had....he was a whore & I refused to compete.  My mom didn't like him because he was a bad-boy, so I knew it wasn't going to happen.  But I never lost the way he made me feel.  He ALWAYS took my breath away, made me nervous, goofy, all the things a high school girl does over her first love.  My parents both knew how I felt about him & both knew I was devastated whenever I would hear about his next girlfriend, his bad-boy reputation, etc.  He moved on & so did I.  At 18, I left for the Navy.  I didn't know what happened to him....we just went on with our lives.

Now, I'm not going to lie.  After the internet came around, there were random times throughout the years that I would google his name (and honestly, I think everyone has done that with people from their past at some point or another).  I didn't really want anything, just wanted to see if I could figure out what became of him.  I never got any hits.  Not one.  No big deal.  I was happily married, having babies, etc.

About 5 years ago, we went home to KS for a vacation.  It was August.  The county fair was in town.  I was standing in line at the ferris wheel with my boys.  A guy in front of me bumped into me & he turned around to apologize.  It was W.  With his wife.  And his son.  We of course recognized each other immediately.  He introduced me to his family, I introduced him to mine.  Truth be told, had I known he was in that line, I wouldn't have been in it.  We made small-talk, then got on the ride.  I was never so happy to get off a ferris wheel.  I didn't see him again.

One evening out of the blue, my mom calls me.  "Guess who I just saw?"  Who?  "GUESS!" she says.  Um, Mom, I haven't lived there in 13 or 14 years....I have no idea who you saw (and why do I give a shit, I thought).  She says "W**** B**********!!!"  (She ALWAYS said his first & last name, never called him just by his first name.)  She was so excited to call & tell me she saw him & that he came over to say hello to her, asked about me, etc....I smiled at the memories, was glad to know he was doing well.

Fast forward to a few months ago when I get the FB friend request from him.  (Sidenote--at this point, I'd been separated for 9 or 10 months....just thought you should know that this story has nothing to do with the breakup of my marriage.)  I'm driving down the road as I receive it.  My eyes probably nearly fell out of my head.  I had to think about this one.  I put my phone down & drifted back in time.  I waivered my current situation against one with him back in my life (granted, I had no idea of his circumstances, but I knew I'd be magnetized to him regardless).  I knew if I accepted, things in my world could change or I could be disappointed or we could be friends....hell, we both know the same people.  It was a crapshoot.  What do I do?  So I let the request sit there.  I did everything to avoid my laptop that evening.  Finally, after every last chore I could possibly think of was done, I got on my computer.  I accepted his request....it was one of those "do it now or don't ever do it" moments (and trust me, I'm not one to skip over possible life-changing moments...it's an adrenaline thing, I think).  And as I do with anyone who friend-requests me, I went to his page & said something to the effect of Hi, how are you, hope you're well.  Then I went & changed my status.  It was a goofy, off-the-wall status that I posted, no truth to it, whatsoever.  It was about drinking beer with a homeless man in my living room & I'm starting to be concerned....next thing I know, W changes his status to "What in the hell, M?  Are you ok?"  So I comment & ask if that was directed to me.  It was.  We commented back & forth a bit.  Then he sent me a msg asking for my number, said he was doing FB on his phone & it was a pain in the ass.  I hesitated.  Why would he want my number?  He's married with kids (as I knew from seeing him in KS that one time).  We msg'd back & forth a bit more, I finally gave him my number.  He called almost immediately. 

....to be continued, work beckons.  :)

1 comment:

  1. Wow. This story sounds too eerily familiar.
    Maybe it's just all too common with the age of Facebook.

    Gave me his number & all, but nothing's come of it thus far. It's me. I feel we're too different, but could be wrong.

    Nice to know these things can/do work out sometimes, though. ;~}